I had surgery yesterday and it really hurts so much.. People who say it's fine are surprised. People think I'm going crazy because of the pain after surgery, so no matter how much it hurts, I tend to be rational and say I'm in pain or I'm the type who doesn't say anything. But right after the surgery, I kept ringing the bell and begging to be saved.. It hurt so much.. I wish I had known before the surgery. Before the surgery, I was worried that I wouldn't wake up from the anesthesia? Even after waking up from anesthesia, I was still dizzy and my neck really hurt sooooooo much, it was beyond my imagination.. Feeling this pain, I thought I should never put a knife in my face again.. I really thought if I die, this is how I would die. I usually have a slight panic attack, but because of sleep apnea, I keep waking up and when I lie down, my neck starts hurting so much that I can only sleep sitting up, even if it's not because of the swelling.. I wake up every 30 minutes and I was so anxious in the hospital room yesterday, but I feel a little better now that I'm home and getting a cold compress... I absolutely won't do this when I go back, it hurts so much.. The swelling is serious, but if I can just solve the pain, sleep, and anxiety, I think I'll really live.. My pronunciation is also serious... It's only been 1 day, haha. I have to go to the hospital again tomorrow. There wasn't much bleeding, so the blood clot didn't form, but I think it's bleeding again after the stitches.. They said they'll drain it with a syringe in a week, but I'm worried about that too... I just hope that my bones heal well without nonunion.. All I can think about right now is that health is the most important thing..