Hand cut after plastic surgery

Haha, I had failed eye surgery twice, so this time I had eye surgery and nose surgery. But this time, even though there was still swelling, I felt like my eye and nose lines came out well, so I was satisfied, and even my friends were telling me that it was going well. But hahahaha, one of my friends whom I believed to be my best friend, what is it? I don't know if it's a sign, but what did you do in front of everyone and it failed so you tried again this time, so I'm glad it worked out this time? When I saw him laughing out loud and talking like this, I got so upset that I cut my hands off... I don't think I was like that before, but I feel like my true nature is coming out because I'm upset and it's so creepy.