When I was very young, I was pretty enough to be a kids model, but after I entered middle school, I suddenly gained a lot of weight, my skin turned out, my teeth grew crooked, and I became the ugliest person I've ever seen. But
people around me looked at me, especially people who had seen me since I was young. There are people who say things like, "You were pretty when you were young, why did you get so skinny,," and there are so many people who just look you up and down and pass by, and they
ask why you gained weight even though you don't eat much, and how did you take care of your skin to make it turn upside down. People who meet me for the first time treat me like a lazy person, and
I want to take care of myself, but honestly, what would a teenage student do? ㅠㅠ My parents also say that it will get better with time, but
anyway, I got really ugly + people's gaze/treatment caused me to get sick. I used to be very depressed,
but after I turned 20, my skin suddenly became clearer and I lost fat and breast fat. LOL Until I was in my late teens, I always left half of my food to look pretty (but it became a habit). I spent a lot of money and gave up and just used toner lotion,
but it was amazing. As I lost weight, my eyes got bigger (double eyelids also got bigger) and I saved up money to get Botox, so I guess I was living a bad life, but this time, I got prettier after getting a nose job. It suddenly hit me.
Since I live overseas, I've never been subjected to things like this, but hehe.
This could be just my mood. Should I say that I'm treated differently when I work part-time? Especially to Asians, (Westerners don't discriminate on looks ^__^) and they just blatantly say I'm pretty. There are ladies who ask me or how I take care of my skin, and I can feel young people staring intently at my face.
And there are a lot of customers who want to have small talk. In the past, there were only customers who would just say what they wanted to say, but now they actually work somewhere. What country are you from? Should I say that there have been a lot of customers talking about TMI like this? And then they ask me the same question ㅜㅜ
Yesterday, my family (+ my sister's boyfriend) and I were looking for old videos, and then an image of myself from back in the day came up, and my sister's boyfriend said that person was me. He was so surprised hahahaha he really seems like a different person,,
but I also feel the same way because I didn't delete the photos I uploaded in the past, but made them private, but when I look at those photos, my old face is completely gone.
I want to upload before and after photos, but my identity is revealed. Because I didn't like it again, anyway, it suddenly occurred to me and I wrote it down. I feel like I've become really happy these days. Lookism is really true. When I was ugly, my self-esteem was low and my sense of entitlement was very high, but since I became pretty, I received a lot of small considerations and things like comparing myself to others. You don’t have to!!
님
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